Oh man, this is turning out to be a terrible night, I just can't sleep. Im exhausted, I want nothing more than to drift away but for some reason I can't. I started to fall asleep around 11pm, but was disturbed a couple of times by nothing much. After the second disturbance I was awake and that was it. I tried to sleep until 12:15, then I took a sleep inducing tablet. This had no effect. Around 1am I started getting a headache and I was already uncomfortable, my body aching from tiredness. So I took. Couple of paracetamol, a trick that has often helped me to sleep in the past. But again, no effect.
At 2am I started getting desperate. Marion woke briefly and persuaded me to take half a proper sleeping tablet, which I have done. It's now 2:30 and so far no effect. I'm lying here wide awake, extremely tired and very worried. I have a full day at the office later, but I guess that there's now no chance of me being able to do it, I'll be lucky if I can save the afternoon.
My mind is so active, in overdrive, and my heart is beating in my chest like it used to when as a child I woke early on Christmas morning, like something exciting is about to happen. It's ridiculous but I do not seem to have any control over either thing. Try as I might I can't stop my mind jumping around like a kangaroo on speed. It's like a badly filmed pop concert where the picture constantly flicks from one angle to another without giving you any time to absorb the picture. I've been thinking about cycling, about work, about summer holiday, about Nattie's operation, about Lauren's schooling, about finding a new MTB route, about flights to Lefkas, about a friend's house that got hit by a large rock, about not having phoned my friends in the US for a while, etc, etc. I've also got a song constantly playing in my head, "Love changes everything", which I suppose I must have picked up from the radio this afternoon. Gee, it's real noisy in my head.
Now 2:50 and no sign of the tablet cutting in. My heart is still thumping hard, but not particularly fast. I'm wondering what the hell to do next. I'm managing to keep thoughts of Kay a arm's length but I don't know how long I'll be able to keep that up. Marion is fast asleep, her deep regular breathing making me very envious.
I suppose that I'll just have to try reading for a bit and see what happens. Wish me luck...
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Good luck sleeping. I still have trouble even now. I've ended up watching movies on my laptop all night long, then going straight to work. Not good when you're driving on the motorway! Long walks and hot cocoa were always better than any chemical sleep remedy. Peaceful sleep is elusive when you're not at peace. Remember, you can always contact us here in Aus during your night.
ReplyDeleteOh Rob, you should have called me. I was tapping out a message to you at the time you were awake writing this. I hope you found sleep in the end.
ReplyDeleteThat racing heart beat thing is a killer. I find reading the only thing at times like that. A glass of milk and some biscuits and read a chapter of a book. I'm reading Maos Last Dancer before bed at the moment, great book but works a little quickly on me regarding sleep induction! I would still recommend it though.
Here's a random thing, that I hope can make you smile slightly! Dom was just asking if I'd like to go to the cinema to see the new Liam Neeson movie. He's just pointed out that we'll have to wait a few months though as my bum will no longer fit in the cinema seats! See what I have to cope with whilst Im trying to write to my brother!!!
Anyway, it's time for another chapter of Maos Last Dancer, so I'll say good night and hope that you manage to survive the day at work ok. I hope you sleep better tonight. Here's hoping. Love Ali xxx
Oh! I can sympathise with that feeling - brain in overdrive and body unbelievably tired. It's fairly new to me - I've always said I can sleep anywhere, anythime, but something's changing.
ReplyDeleteHorrible!
I keep promising myself that I'll learn to meditate and 'empty my brain' of all the peripheral stuff that is so intrusive in the middle of the night, but haven't quite got round to fully finding out about meditation... have picked up a little from books, I'll let you know how it goes.
Meanwhile, I hope today is manageable.
Love and hugs to all
Linda xx
I am tempted to say "Sleep...what's that?"
ReplyDeleteEvery sympathy although sometimes there is some pleasure gained from an hour or eight to myself
Sharon x
if you find the cure for this, please share. I'm so fed up with my noisy head. i can be absolutely exhausted, yawning like crazy, and the minute I turn out the light, boing!!! Wide awake, a million thoughts zipping through my brain. So no answers for you, only empathy.
ReplyDelete