Friday, 15 June 2012

How I miss Kay

I'm missing Kay is very badly at the moment. She's constantly in my mind's eye. I see her hurrying around, hockey stick in one hand, school bag in the other. I so miss her lust for life, her energy and presence. I can smell her hair, feel it brushing on my face. I feel her snuggled up against me, hear her laughing. And I miss her more than ever.

Marion recently wrote that Kay saw everything as a competition. I was amazed and thankful for this observation as it indeed is true and I had forgotten. She spent her life competing in one way or another and she usually won - even if it was occasionally by bending or changing the rules. A friend of Kay's recently also wrote a small piece called "Kay the Boomerang", about how for her Kay keeps coming back. It is a beautiful piece of text and reflects a beautiful thought. And how I wish it were so, that my Kay would come back.

I'm writing this in a public place so I have to curtail my musings before I end up in floods of tears. In a few short months it will be two years since Kay died and I still cannot believe it. Although I'm writing less these days, it's not because I feel less but because I have run out of words to describe the life that I now live. As always, your support and kind thoughts, past and present, remain a source of bouyancy in what otherwise remains a stormy sea.